The Work Diary

I think its kinda funny when people complain about our addiction to the internet.  Or addiction to social media and cell phones.  They say, "oh people today just send text messages or are always on the computer worrying about how many 'friends' they have on Facebook." 

But to me this is a great thing because if everyone is inside on the computer then that means theres way more stuff outside for me to enjoy without all the super annoying other people to get in my way.  For example you walk into a Starbucks, and its packed.  Long line, people talking, some people with headphones - books everywhere like they've been there for days, kids running around. You're conflicted about whether or not you even want the coffee anymore because you don't have anywhere to go - you just might have wanted to sit for a while, look out the window, listen to some Putomayo afro-carribean jazz fusion.  There might even be a seat available - with a table even, but on both sides are people who are just.. No.

Now imagine walking into the Starbucks and nobody is there.  I mean nobody - its completely empty.  You walk in like Christmas morning all bleery eyed from having to get up so early, and the next thing you can't even believe your eyes.  Suddenly the ubiquitous coffee shop music sounds profoundly good without all that ambient bullshit happening all around you.  Even the big cushy seats that who knows how many people have farted into are free!  Its like you've just walked into your coffee shop!  Ok maybe completely empty would be a little weird like an earthquake hit that you slept thru or a zombie virus is spreading like crazy and you forgot that it was today.  Maybe one other person is there.  So you get your coffee and pause considering where to sit.  You look over at the other guy with a surprised happy look on your face gesturing "I've never had a decision like this in my life!"  He looks back like "I know right?"  And of course you sit far away.  Because Ok we had our little moment - now you're this close to being thrown out of my coffee shop ok buddy?

Still don't believe me?  Now turn that single other person into a girl.  Have you ever had a golden opportunity like that?  To meet a hopefully nice person with zero pressure whatsoever?  Where its actually more awkward to keep silent than to give a friendly hello?  Imagine being in an elevator with someone for half an hour and not speaking the entire way.  How rude right?  So you make the same face toward her like "where to sit??"  She doesn't notice because shes buried deep in a book or something.  You walk over to say something like "What are the odds right?" but when she looks up she has a stare thats dead behind the eyes.  A line of drool falling from the corner of her mouth, and her hair is totally crazy like "Ok is it too late to switch you back to a friendly dude?"  She rises from behind the table, limping, and pointing at your with twisted and demented looking fingers, and you realize, "Oh fuck today was the Zombie day wasn't it?"

Trauma. Or great great urgency can create the need to self medicate.

Humans require basic things like food and shelter and perhaps a hierarchical purpose. Missing one of these things can cause great stress. In modern society, you can find food and shelter even with no money, but unaddressed trauma or continued rejection from the hierarchy can create a need to self medicate.

Wanting to be exceptional. To completely bypass the hierarchy can create focus and superhuman, daresay irrational, motivation. This also can be very stressful and require self medication to sustain. It goes against our nature to take on inordinate risk or postpone leisure when there already is an abundance of comfort.

Pursuit of being The Best is crazy and disproportionately benefits the conveyors and supporters at the tragic expense of the risk taker.

So many famous successful musicians suffered from depression and insecurity. The ones I know who aren't successful maybe also suffer as well but just aren't clever enough to acknowledge their professional shortcomings, so they haven't been productive yet.


I never enjoy insecure types and I really can't stand over inflated or massaged egos. So what happens if you're in the middle? Just normal. Sponging up all the information you can process within the scope of comfort and safety. I don't want to know danger or pain. I don't want trauma. So what do I do? I'm not hungry enough for praise and acceptance to push myself over the top. I'll always lose competitively like to a Chinese worker in a factory or a south American soccer player. I'm not willing to die for it or self-medicate to sustain it. There is an entire universe to distract me. Why put all my eggs in one basket? And each one is a time bomb.

Songs are so personal (at least the good ones are) that its stupid to think they're about us. They're about more than we can ever understand because we weren't there. We aren't there in the writer's head experiencing the ingredients that came before the song. We feel lucky and amazed to hear the results, but theres no way words or analysis could ever convey the meaning? no. The sentiment? partially yes but naah. The dream that is attempted to be captured but inevitably reduced to a song.

A great song is a photograph that can not only be shared and displayed but can be performed and even re-formatted, re-designed, re-released. Perhaps the movies, shows, and books I read are too filtered or too prepared. Of course they are because everyone wants to release the best version of their work. But there must be more examples that are more raw, less packaged, more fundamental, less massaged, more childlike, less.. less everything.

Voice is like your vocabulary. You need to flex it and challenge it in order to detect and assimilate new contexts to deploy different phrases! Learn melodies like words to be used later. Learn them inside and out. Story telling requires a sense of timing, arc, tempo, and willingness to challenge the audience. Listen to stories, try them out, and challenge people. Voice is the same: collect a variety of devices that yield different results and experiment with what works in different situations.


You know so little. It's an exciting time to be at the beginning.

I think you wanna have an even tone that doesn't sound stretched at high notes or stressed for breath or more volume.  A basic listenability should be the initial goal.  Recorded with 2 stereo mics about 14 inches away - I think greater richness is achieved by singing directly into a vocal mic 1 inch from your mouth or just record at a much higher level.

I actually think music is a less important form than TV or film. TV is just the best because of the visuals, music, lengthy character exposure, and story arc.

Song is like the blink of an eye. So why do I even like it? There is less going on for sure, but even after the song is over, the textures or rising / falling parts linger in your mind. Song is much more potent when it comes to staying power. Why is it that the better the tune the more difficult it is to recall in short term memory, but when you hear it again your long term memory snaps into action?

Maybe I like song because it is the highest yielding form with the fewest number of tools needed. It certainly requires practice which can be eternally frustrating and daunting, but this is what makes it great in the end.

Music as well can assuredly be assisted with a variety of tools to streamline production, but these don't necessarily at all improve the end product. Sometimes modified songs can create a departure from reality like a photographer using Photoshop, but to me the most grounded results are the best (and by best I mean the strongest staying power). I also enjoy photography because its also high yielding and very powerful to the end consumer. You simply need your instrument, practice, and maybe some refinement at the end, but almost instantly you can present the product to a viewer.

My favorite form to enjoy is TV, but the most challenging, complex form reliant on few tools is music.